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Toddler Defiance and Wifely Submission

We have not had a lot of good Mother Goose Time days this month.  Part of it has been my lack of organization, the usual culprit.  Add to that Michael having a few extra days off this month, which always throws me off, and Little Guy picking the last few weeks to decide to test my authority on pretty much everything, and Mother Goose Time is just not getting done as regularly as it should.  

Little Guy is really stubborn.  Thankfully, not as stubborn as me, or he could turn into a real little tyrant.  His stubbornness has limited the time we have available to do fun things.  My kid would rather spend his whole day sitting at the table than eat a carrot when he decides that he doesn't feel like eating vegetables anymore.  I had been sending him to bed when he was not eating them, since if you don't get energy from food you can get it from sleep, but then one day I gave him his plate and he ASKED to go to bed, so I realized that wasn't really an effective disciplinary measure.

Anyways, Little Guy is an amazing kid, and I adore him, but every so often he seems to question whether I am still in charge and spends a month or so testing me EVERY SINGLE CHANCE HE GETS!  I am trying to decide if it is because I get lenient when he is being generally compliant and obedient, so he thinks he can push further, or if he wants confirmation that I can handle him no matter what he throws my way.

I have also considered the possibility that perhaps Little Guy and I are BOTH learning a lesson here.  I am NOT a good example of obedience.  There is rarely a time that Michael asks me to do something I am say yes.  I am much to willful for my own good and am not training my children as well as I could be because of this.  So perhaps as much as Little Guy needs to learn obedience to his parents, I need to learn obedience to my husband, and God is showing me just how absurd I look when I don't.  

I love my husband and believe that wives should obey their husbands unless their husband tells them to do something that would go against God's word.  I believe that children should obey their parents (until they are adults) unless they tell them to do something that would go against God's word .  BUT I am much better at requiring obedience of my children then demonstrating my OWN obedience.  

So while I have been praying for Little Guy A LOT, I have also been adding in prayers for myself on the same topics.  He is demonstrating and amplifying my worst behaviors, like one of those horrible mirrors that magnifies you and lets you see just how wild and unruly your eyebrows are.  I need to require change of him, because his disobedience is unacceptable, but I need to create a change in myself to, because I do not want to be a hypocrite.

This post isn't meant as a complaint against my sweet son.  I am not going to lie.  Going to battle about vegetables every meal (seriously, I skip giving him vegetables sometimes just to be able to skip the ensuing fight), having your every request be denied and having to turn it into a demand that ends in a tantrum and time-out, and having someone refuse to talk to you when he knows the correct answer is not the one he wants to give ("Are you allowed to throw toys in the family room?") is exhausting, but every battle won is a step forward in the war.  Not a war against my son, but a war to earn his respect as a rightful authority.

To finish on a positive note, I am going to list a few amazing things about Little Guy.

1.  He is funny. 
2.  He is smart.
3.  He is affectionate.
4.  He is polite.
5.  He is wonderful at sitting still and paying attention.
6.  He is (usually) obedient.
7.  He is helpful.
8.  He loves books.
9.  He is independent.


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